The 7 Sins of Small Talk
Friday, May 11th, 2012Are you guilty of practicing one of the seven sins of small talk? They’re so simple to do, appear so inconsequential, but whenever we put them into practical use, we automatically place a damper on the speaking relationship that we’ve got with the other person. Therefore, what are the Seven Sins of Small Talk ?
1. Interrupting the person that is talking.
Interrupting an individual in mid-sentence, not only derails the other person’s line of thought, it can make it complicated for them to keep on past the interruption.
2. Hogging the ’small talk ‘ platform.
Although we may have riveting chats with ourselves, hogging the conversation shows no effort, on our part, to engage the other person. Building a meaningful talking relationship requires give and take between you and the other person.
3. Usurping the other person’s experience.
Occasionally, an individual will grab a speaking partner’s experience, and interject their own story. A friend of mine was questioned about her recent hiking trip. She had barely started her story when the other person snapped the words ‘hiking trip ‘ out of her mouth and then, proceeded to upstage her by filling in details about his own hiking adventure.
4. Questioning your speaking partner.
While asking questions inspire dialogue, asking too many questions one after the other in fast succession, can put your talking partner on the defence. If they feel interrogated, they may doubtless leave you sooner, rather than later on.
5. Providing one word answers.
Have you ever attempted chatting with someone that replies with simply a word? How’s the new job? Fine. What did you have for lunch? Tuna. Where did you go for lunch? Tim’s. While there is nothing wrong with the odd one word, or really brief reply, neither one contributes to finding common ground on which to build a talking relationship.
6. Talking with food in your mouth.
When a person asks us a question and we have food in our mouth, we will be able to recognise the inquirer with a light motion of our hand indicating that we have something in our mouth. Finish our chewing; swallow and then speak.
7. Arguing or debating?.
While some of us like verbal sparring, it is best left for when we should fight antagonistic takeovers, not when we are attempting to join in ‘agreeable ‘ small talk.
Avoid these lethal seven sins of small talk and you will soon develop a rep for being a brilliant conversationalist!
A skilled and prize-winning speaker, Dorothea Hendriksbrings you presentations, keynotes, coaching and workshops that engage, entertain and inform. Some say her keenness is a tonic.Dorothea’s expertise is teaching folk the right way to connect, communicate and develop working relationships. Whether or not you are talking to a large group, or having a one-on-one conversation, her accent on the soft skills of communication, perspective, interpersonal, networking, and conversational development for positive outcomes which will build sales and promote careers.A successful entrepreneur, Dorothea focuses on helping you go beyond your private barriers, through public presenting, presentation methods, to successfully traverse your networking events with poise, grace and results.